An Open Letter to my Teenage Self | Christal Joan

Bismillahir rahmanir raheem

There’s so much I wish I could tell my teenage self.

Hormones raging, simple life events seeming like the end of the world, it’s all normal at but being so wrapped up in life in the moment makes you forget this completely. So here’s my advice to my teenage self.


I was an awkward kid. The tallest in the class and more interested in books than boys and make up. But I never tried to fit in. I realised that everyone is an individual and rather than spending my entire secondary school life trying to fit in I thought I’d rather stand out and be myself. By doing this, I found like- minded people who were willing to do the same. Whether we looked like a bunch of misfits or not I didn’t care. I knew who I was and I didn’t want to try to be like anyone else.


Everything for the next few years will feel like the end of the world. Losing friends, exam results, not having the body you want subhanAllah. But I’ll let you into a little secret…. Your situation is constantly changing. Those friends will come back and if they don’t it means Allah swt removed them for a reason. If you’ve put in the work with your exams, the results will follow and the body…. well that will come. And if it doesn’t it’s not the end of the world. You are who you are, be comfortable in your own mind first, you can only be you alhamdulillah and that’s what makes you special. Mistakes will be made but the trick is to learn from them and move on.


How I waited for the ‘glo’ up! I felt like everyone around me was blossoming into beautiful swans and I was still the ugly duckling. I could handle my personality being different but physically I struggled. And then the ‘glo’ up came. I still remember looking in the mirror at 16 and thinking “well, this isn’t bad is it?” And that progression into liking what I saw continued for years and is still happening now. I became comfortable in my own skin, so much so, I didn’t need make up to make me happy with what I saw in the mirror. Now at the age of 26, I’m grateful I didn’t fall into the trap of trying to ‘glo’ up too soon, I was ready when it came. It was the right time for me and the right time will come for you too.


No bills, no food shopping and no commitments. Enjoy this time! The times I sat down as a teenager praying to grow up, to have a more mature lifestyle… And now all I want is that time back! This is a wonderful time of self discovery and you should enjoy every minute of it. With a baby on the way inshaAllah I wonder what his/ her teenage years will teach them about themselves. I pray I live long enough to see them grow, blossom and take on the world and hopefully one day read what advice they would like to give to their teenage self.

What advice would you give to your teenage self? Share it in the comments below and I’ll feature the best ones on my instagram page!

Christal Joan x

7 thoughts on “An Open Letter to my Teenage Self | Christal Joan

  1. Aleeza S says:

    Oh I sooooo wish I could just go that younger crazy confused self, shake her up and say this all to her. But yes Alhamdulillah for the amazing journey of self discovery.

  2. Maha says:

    I’m a teenager right now, so I could say this is helpful. I guess you could say I’m kinda awkward and the introverted type as well so reading this was nice. I’m not entirely sure if I’ll end up applying these tips all the time though haha (even though I’d want to)- I guess that’s what it means to be a ‘teenager’. Hopefully I too can look back at myself and be satisfied and happy just like you are, InshaAllah

    • Christal Joan says:

      Jazakillahu khayrun for the comment. I really do hope the tips have atleast helped to get your through the teenage years inshaAllah they can be rocky but they won’t last forever

  3. Ashley Bounoura says:

    I would actually tell my teenage self…up until about the age of 21 or so really, to stop working so hard! I only recently learned that there are some things in my life like prayer, health, or family, etc. that it is 100% OK to prioritise over school or work. One example of how much of an overachiever I used to be: in my first year at uni I found out just before my morning class that my grandma that I was very close to passed away, and I grabbed my tissues and went to class. It wasn’t until I was in the middle of walking to me SECOND class that day that I realised that I could go home and grieve and be with my family, and that is what a normal person would do. So yeah, priorities!

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